Han's pov:
After I finished getting ready to head out to the mall to buy some early Christmas presents, I headed downstairs ready to head out. But before I could even put on my shoes Ujin stopped me, "where are you going?"
"I told you already, I'm going to the mall with Jay." I replied, confused on why he was asking cause I already informed him already.
"Dressed like that?" He pointed out as he looked at me up and down, I chuckled nervously as I looked down at my outfit. "What's wrong with what I'm wearing?"
"These shorts are too short, why are you wearing a crop top in this weather it's not summer." He commented, "you're dressed like you're going to a bar looking to get laid tonight."
I stared at him, my mouth falling open slightly. "Excuse me? It's just shorts and a crop top, Ujin. It's not that deep."
"It is that deep," he shot back, crossing his arms as his eyes narrowed. "You're engaged. You shouldn't be walking around like… like you're trying to get attention."
I felt my frustration bubble up, but I tried to keep calm. "First of all, I'm not 'walking around' anywhere—I'm going to the mall. With Jay. Second, this outfit isn't about anyone else. I'm wearing it because it's comfortable."
"Comfortable?" he echoed, raising an eyebrow. "It's freezing outside. How is that comfortable?"
"Ujin," I said, pinching the bridge of my nose, "I'll be inside the mall 99% of the time. And for the record, you've seen me wear this exact outfit before without a problem. Why is it suddenly an issue now?"
His jaw tightened, and he looked away for a moment before muttering, "it's different if you wear around me, I'm your partner."
"But now you're heading out looking like a man slut, I thought we agreed on you not to wear revealing clothing like this!"
I froze, my grip tightening on the strap of my bag. My heart sank as his words echoed in my mind. A slut. He had actually said it.
"Ha-"
"It's perfectly fine, I'll just go change." I cut him off before he said anything else.
I turned on my heel and headed back upstairs without looking at him. My chest felt tight, my mind racing with a storm of emotions I didn't have the energy to sort through.
Reaching my bedroom, I shut the door quietly—too quietly. If I let it slam, it would've been an invitation for Ujin to come after me, and right now, I just needed space.
I dropped my bag onto the bed and stood there for a moment, staring at my reflection in the full-length mirror. The shorts and crop top that had felt so carefree and comfortable this morning now felt like a costume—a target.
A man slut. That's what he'd called me.
I bit the inside of my cheek, fighting back the sting of tears. Was this what I was signing up for? A lifetime of walking on eggshells around his insecurities? Of having my choices picked apart and my body policed because he couldn't handle his own jealousy?
I took a deep breath, my hands trembling slightly as I reached for a sweater and a pair of jeans. Pulling them on mechanically, I avoided looking in the mirror again. This wasn't about the outfit anymore—it was about how little trust he'd just shown me.
As I walked back downstairs, Ujin was still standing in the entryway, his expression a mix of guilt and hesitation. When he saw me, his eyes flicked over my new outfit, and he opened his mouth to speak, but I beat him to it.
"Happy now?" I asked, my tone flat.
"Han, I didn't mean—"
"Don't," I said sharply, holding up a hand. "Don't try to explain it away. I won't take long at the mall." I slipped into my shoes and quickly walked out.
Yes I was used to these kind of outbursts from him whenever I did something he didn't like, and every time names will be thrown at me but it wasn't a very big deal. Over the years I've gotten used to it, yes we agreed to get him help and yes he has been going for counseling but I guess there was no progress.
Call me dumb for just sitting around and taking everything that is being thrown at me but… I've been with Ujin for a decade now and his literally the only person I love. His the only person I have right now, I threw away my family to be with him so I have to take all the good and bad that comes with him.
The cold air outside bit at my skin, but it was a welcome distraction from the ache in my chest. I walked briskly, trying to focus on the crisp sound of my footsteps on the pavement rather than the swirl of emotions clawing at me.
Over the years, I'd told myself that Ujin's temper was just something to endure—that his love outweighed his flaws. After all, who doesn't have flaws? But moments like this made it harder to ignore the cracks in that logic.
I reached the bus stop and pulled out my phone, opening the messaging app to text Jay.
Running late, but on my way. Don't leave without me.
Almost immediately, a reply popped up.
Don't worry, I'm here. But you better not take too long or I'm buying all the good stuff without you.
I smiled faintly at Jay's teasing message, grateful for the distraction. He'd always been the one person who could make me laugh, even on days like this.
As the bus pulled up, I climbed on and took a seat near the back, staring out the window as the city blurred past. My mind wandered to the early days with Ujin, back when everything felt simple. He'd been sweet, attentive, and so full of life that I couldn't imagine myself with anyone else.
But somewhere along the way, things had changed. His temper, his insecurities—they'd grown sharper, more cutting. I told myself it was just stress, that it wasn't him, not really. And every time he apologized, I believed him.
Still, the words he'd thrown at me today lingered like a bruise.
Man slut.
I swallowed hard, forcing the memory down.
By the time the bus reached the mall, I was determined to put it behind me, at least for the day. I stepped off and spotted Jay waiting near the entrance, holding two cups of coffee.
"Look who finally decided to show up," he teased, handing me one of the cups.
"Traffic," I lied with a shrug, taking the cup.
He eyed me for a moment, his usual playful smirk softening into something closer to concern. "You okay? You seem… off."
I hesitated, debating whether to brush it off or let him in. Jay had been my best friend for years, but I wasn't sure if I could handle his judgment if I told him the truth.
"I'm fine," I said finally, forcing a smile. "Just tired."
Jay didn't look convinced, but he let it go. "Alright, but you're buying the first round of food court snacks. No arguments."
"Deal," I said, grateful for the distraction as we walked into the mall together.
For now, I could pretend everything was fine. For now, I could focus on the holiday decorations, the bustling crowds, and Jay's endless chatter.
———————
Later that evening as they sun began to set down the horizon and we were done shopping, I guess I was feeling a little better. But the thought of heading home was just draining, I didn't really want to face UJin in this moment; eventually I'll come around and forgive him but things he said today were more hurtful than other stuff he had said in the past.
"Drop me off at HaeJoon's house." I told Jay as we entered the car, he turned to look at me confused. "Why?" He questioned.
"I have something he asked me to buy for him, so I'll just stay there for a while and call Ujin to pick me later." I lied.
Jay raised an eyebrow, clearly skeptical. "Since when do you run errands for HaeJoon? And why would you call Ujin later when you're already with me?"
I avoided his gaze, fiddling with the shopping bag in my lap. "It's no big deal, Jay. Just drop me off, okay?"
He didn't start the car right away. Instead, he leaned back in his seat, watching me with a mixture of curiosity and concern. "Han, what's really going on? You've been off all day, and now you want to go to HaeJoon's out of the blue? Come on, talk to me."
I let out a sigh, the weight of the day pressing down on me. Jay had always been good at reading me, and I knew he wasn't going to let this go.
"I just… don't feel like going home right now," I admitted quietly, staring down at my hands.
Jay's expression softened, and he nodded slowly. "Ujin again?"
I hesitated before giving a small nod.
"What happened this time?" he asked gently.
I chewed on my lip, debating how much to say. Jay had been my rock for years, but even he didn't know the full extent of what I dealt with. "He just… said some stuff. Hurtful stuff."
Jay's grip on the steering wheel tightened, his jaw clenching. "Han, you can't keep letting him do this to you. It's not okay."
"I know," I said quickly, not wanting to get into a full-blown discussion about it. "I know, Jay. I just need some time to cool off, that's all."
Jay sighed, running a hand through his hair. "Alright, fine. I'll drop you off at HaeJoon's. But if you need anything—or if you change your mind—you call me, okay?"
"Thanks, Jay," I said, offering him a small smile.
The car ride to HaeJoon's was mostly quiet, the tension from our conversation lingering in the air. When we arrived, Jay parked in front of the apartment complex.
"Promise me you'll be okay," he said, his tone firm.
"I will," I lied, grabbing my bags and stepping out of the car.
As I stepped out, the cold evening air nipped at my skin, but it was nothing compared to the chill I felt inside. I turned back to look at Jay, who was still watching me from the car, his expression a mix of worry and reluctance.
"Thanks for today," I said softly, clutching my bags a little tighter.
He gave me a small nod. "Anytime. Call me if you need anything, okay?"
I nodded, but we both knew I probably wouldn't. Jay drove off slowly, his car disappearing around the corner, leaving me standing there in the fading light.
I turned toward the apartment building and took a deep breath. The weight of the day pressed down on me as I made my way inside. When I reached HaeJoon's door, I hesitated for a moment, unsure if I should even be here. But before I could talk myself out of it, I knocked.
It didn't take long for the door to open. HaeJoon stood there in a loose hoodie and sweatpants, his hair slightly messy like he'd just been lounging around. His eyebrows lifted in surprise when he saw me.
"Han?" he asked, his tone laced with confusion. "What are you doing here?"
I forced a small smile as I walked past him and into the apartment, "let me crash for like 3 days."
"What happened now?" He asked as he closed the door behind him, I shook my head dropping the bags on the floor and slumped on the couch.
"Nothing serious," I mumbled, leaning back into the cushions. "Just… needed some time away."
HaeJoon gave me a skeptical look as he walked over to the couch and sat on the armrest. "You always say it's nothing, and then three days later, I get the full story. So, why not skip the waiting this time?"
I sighed, running a hand through my hair. "It's just Ujin being Ujin. He said some things… things that hurt."
His jaw tightened slightly, but he didn't say anything right away. Instead, he leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. "Again!"
"Han, you can't let this keep going on. You guys are engaged you can't continue to take this, it's either you end the whole relationship or call off the engagement."
I leaned back against the couch, staring at the ceiling as his words sank in. I'd heard them before—similar warnings from Jay, quiet concerns from others—but hearing it from HaeJoon stung in a different way.
"I know you're trying to help," I said softly, "but it's not that simple."
"Why not?" he pressed, his voice firm but not unkind. "Han, you're miserable. He tears you down, makes you second-guess yourself, and then what? You forgive him because you love him? Love isn't supposed to hurt like this."
I bit my lip, blinking back the sting of tears. "I've been with him for ten years, HaeJoon. You know that. I can't just walk away from him like it's nothing. I gave up everything for this relationship—my family, my friends… I chose him."
"And you think that means you have to keep choosing him, no matter what?" he asked, his tone softening.
I looked at him, my voice breaking slightly. "What if I don't have anything else? What if I leave and there's nothing left for me?"
HaeJoon's expression softened further, and he slid off the armrest to sit beside me on the couch. "Han, you'll always have something left. You'll have people who care about you—like me, Jay, others. You're not as alone as you think."
I shook my head, wiping at my eyes. "It's not that easy. He's not all bad, you know. He's trying—he's been going to counseling—he's just…"
"Just what?" HaeJoon asked gently.
I sighed, my shoulders sagging. "He's still figuring it out. And I keep telling myself it'll get better, that we'll get through it. I just… I don't know."
HaeJoon reached out, placing a hand on my shoulder. "Han, I get it. You love him, and you want to believe he can change. But at what cost? You can't keep losing pieces of yourself to make it work."
His words hit harder than I wanted to admit, and I didn't know how to respond. Instead, I leaned into his side, letting the quiet comfort of his presence fill the silence.
"Just think about it," he said softly, his arm draping around me. "You deserve more than this, Han. You deserve to be happy."
"But I love him Joon"
TBC