= Sarah POV =
I took a few minutes to compose myself before I returned to the bedroom. Immediately I was met with the aroma of a vanilla latte wafting through the room. Chris was sitting cross-legged, happily eating her breakfast while mine was waiting for me beneath a glass dish cover.
"This looks amazing," I said as I sat down and took off the lid. The food was still hot, and I had missed out on noticing the tasty-looking pancakes buried underneath the scrambled egg.
"I'm glad you think so; please dig in. I have to go to work later in the afternoon as the upcoming gala is set to receive guests in three weeks," Chris explained, cutting into some of the scrambled egg and wolfing it down, "I'll be supervising the dietary needs of the patrons on-site to make sure there are no mix-ups, such as where the vegetarian and the non-vegetarian cuisine is situated in the banquet hall" Chris explained to me.
I nodded and cut into my food. 'This was nice. When was the last time Chris and I just had a casual conversation?' I thought to myself.
"So, about last night, I'll try my best to do what I can to make you feel comfortable here with me," Chris said and smiled at me.
I looked at her, confused " What? Sorry, did we talk about something important last night? Because I…." I thought carefully to my last memory…someone was singing…" I must have fallen asleep after someone sang their karaoke song last night, and I don't remember anything else that happened," I admitted sheepishly.
"Oh! I see. Well… yeah, you just mentioned…" Chris began to say then stopped, running a hand through her hair as if the conversation had taken a nervous turn for her.
I reached out across the table, "Hey, I'm sorry I forgot. Just tell me what I said, even if it's embarrassing; I'm the one who said it right?" I asked, squeezing the hand that was still resting on the table.
Chris looked at my hand on hers, and then looked up at me. Her expression was unreadable, and for a moment, I wondered just how strange was the thing I said last night. I was about to say something when Chris broke into a relaxed smile and nodded.
"Actually, to sum it up, you said you missed your parents, so," Chris said, looking a little sheepish.
"Oh, is it? I'm sorry, I don't remember, but thanks for telling me I said that." I said and smiled, pulling back my hand, "Though now that we're on the subject, yeah, I do miss them. In fact, I would love to go with you if you're ever able to take some time off. The fruits out in Hokkaido are some of the best; you know how delicious the apples that my mom grows," I grinned, already mentally drooling about homemade apple pies and apple jam.
Chris sat up straighter and smiled "Hey, that's a great idea! I'd love to talk to your parents; maybe getting their perspective might be a good idea."
"Their perspective on what?" I asked, stabbing a nice juice piece of sausage and popping it into my mouth.
"Oh umm…" Chris expression became unreadable again. She looked down at her food and I felt the urge to do something a little bold, like grab her chin and lift her face to look at me, but I dismissed the thought as she carried on talking.
"…the current situation on agriculture. You know how my workplace imports a lot of produce from local farms; I would love to get an insider scoop on how the market is for those producing what we turn into dishes and desserts," Chris explained, though she seemed a little nervous as she said it.
"Ohhhh…ok," I replied, though something was telling me that she wasn't being entirely honest with me. However, I decided not to pry. If she wasn't comfortable with telling me whatever it was, I wasn't about to push her to open up about it.
"In that case, let's take some time off during the summer. I usually just stay in the city, but seeing as we could both benefit from some time spent with my parents, the summer would be the right time to go to the countryside. You will get the best produce and get a first-hand account from the ones that pick it," I suggest with a warm smile; just thinking of the train ride down was an exhilarating idea.
Chris leaned forward, resting her elbows on the table, and crossed her arms, resting her head on her hands. "Honestly, that sounds like a lovely idea. I'll discuss plans with you later this year. I…would really love that, and who knows, maybe we might move there permanently"
I laughed, "Permanently? What are you saying... are you interested in the little cottage amongst the apple trees?"
Chris tilted her head to the side and gave me a lopsided grin, "Yeah, I think it would suit you very nicely, country girl"
I blushed and bit my lip, looking down at my food, "You know it would, but I'm trying to carve a life out here. Besides, I haven't found what I've been looking for…" I said and sighed.
Chris raised her eyebrow, "What? Another person to teach you how to clap a-"
I reached over and shoved a piece of pancake into Chris' mouth.
"Shut up! It's not like that!" I said, blushing fiercely, "And I don't wanna talk about it anyway. But yeah, it has something to do with relationships, ok?" I said, red in the face while Chris swallowed the piece of pancake and laughed.
"Alright, I won't tease you about it, I think you're red enough already," She grinned and returned back to our food.
As our conversation turned to other things, I couldn't help but wonder about the secret reason I was out in the city in the first place. I wondered whether maybe Chris was right and I should just go home. Life was actually good in the countryside. I didn't need to work because my family owned farmland, and I could always stay in the old cottage at the edge of the property.
It's been five years since I started looking for the one who slipped through my fingers, and no matter how long I've been here in the city, I still haven't been able to find her. Looking over at Chris, sometimes my heart ached and I thought, 'Maybe I could give up looking for my first love… maybe, just maybe… if Chris became my second love…I'd give up looking for her altogether.'
However there was the promise I had made to my first love hanging over me like a heavy burden. I felt obligated to keep going as long as I didn't fall in love with another, worried that she too was somewhere out there, waiting for me to come find her. If only I could just find her, then I could see my promise through to the end, once and for all, even if she no longer cared for me the way we once cared for each other.