Day 2
2:00
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I hear something fall and shatter, like a thousand plates crashing, and I woke up in fright, covered in sweat.
I breath quickly, loudly, i had a nightmare where i saw Caleb getting eaten over and over again.
I can hear a faint growl below and i jump from by bed, is it the married couple?
They are not here, i need to sleep.
I tried to sleep but struggled because of the sound of growling and thing falling and breaking
6:00
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BANNG
I get awoken by a gunshot and jump from my bed once again.
It seems there are still survivors nearby.
I really want to get out and find them but i can't recklessly go down, there are zombies outside---and maybe some inside too.
Today's goal is to go down a floor and see the status of the apartment of the married couple.
In this building there is only one apartment for each floor with a big terrace It is a model, and every apartment looks pretty much the same.
7:00
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I start the day with a filling breakfast consisting of a fruit and cup-noodle and I gear up.
I got some gloves a sweatshirt and a jean and took the iron bar with me.
I sadly have no flashlight so i take my lighter for some meagre lighting
I am scared, i am slightly trembling, i don't want to die just yet?
For fifteen minutes i stay on the floor in front of the door grieving and thinking about the times when Caleb supported me in my dream of creating my own games even if no one believed it would do me any good.
I try to meditate, to calm down.
"I can do it..., i can do it, i can do it, … i can... do it?"
No longer thinking i stand up and check the peephole and with the dim light showing the staircase door, i don't see anything.
I unlock the door and slowly open it.
I take a step out then i close the door behind me. I am sweating a little and anxious.
I take out my lighters and try to light it.
Chk-chk, snap.
The light is really dim but it's better than nothing.
The door wasn't that far just ten steps away from my front door.
I quickly open the door, there is nothing thankfully.
I start to go down step by step i can hear my heart beating even more clearly than my steps.
Then finally after what seemed like an eternity i arrived before the thirteenth floor door. In front of the door i am hesitant but i open it just a little sadly this doesn't give me all the information that i need i can only see the front door of my neighbours.
At least it is not open as i know there is a zombie.
I muster the courage necessary to open the door and i bite my lip and finally, i fully open it. I looked where i couldn't on toward the elevator and nothing, i let out a sigh of relief.
The hall is safe but the odour is putrid it makes me want to vomit.
Cough, couch
I unwantedly let out two coughs.
I stop moving. Did the zombies inside heard me? Are they now waiting just in front of the door so that when i open it I'll be attacked?
I stick my head to the door but i don't hear any growling or scratching on the door, i think i can at least catch a glimpse of the inside.
I catch the door knot i hold my breath
Dum-dum, dum-dum, dum-dum
Click..
It's closed, i breathed out, i was clouded in my thoughts i didn't even think of the possibility that this was closed.
"I was short sighted"
If i want to get in here or in all the other apartments i need all the keys, only the concierge got the double and he lives on the 1st floor.
I quickly get out of there and go back up into my apartment.
At long last i can relax, it seemed like a great and long expedition but it took me 2 minutes to go down the floor.
-"Ahhhh i will never get out of this building at this pace."
I am too scared for this.
While pondering if i should get bolder and go all the way down in one trip i sit on the sofa for a minute while drinking a soda.
Maybe i can get down by the terrace with a rope? No i am too weak and i don't have a rope, at most i have some sheets but i am not so confident in my rope crafting skill to hang myself from so up in the air.
While thinking about getting intel i got a idea...
-"Yes of course! I had a drone i am so stupid why didn't i think of this sooner."
I go into my bedroom and get the box from under my bed.
I blow on the dust.
-"Please have battery."
I take the controller and start it.
-"40% that's good it should be enough to see the state of the floors and the roof.
I can see myself on the little screen attached to the controller.
-"This is game changer"
I excitedly run to my terrace with the drone under my arm.
I carefully put the drone on the ground and take off.
I go high in the sky and see the whole city bellow from my chair. I can see the zombies more close up, they are disgusting, pieces of flesh falling and sticking to the ground.
Then i go down to the thirteenth floors and look from the terrace, the bay window has hand print of blood on it.
-"What happened here?"
I come closer to the windows and am shocked by what i see. a body, almost devoid of flesh or clothes, lying in a pool of dried brownish-red blood.
I can see the dish cabinet open, on the ground with lot of broken pieces on the ground.
-"Maybe that's what woke me up?"
And next to it the husband and the wife wandering, walking slowly, randomly.
I reached this day's goal to gather information about downstairs, i never heard any children in there so there should be only the both of them in there. But it will still be challenging.
I finished the day reading a book from my library to pass the time and treated myself to some fruit and biscuits.
Day 3
All night i dreamed of what i saw earlier imagining the scene play over and over and thinking of how it could have happened and why finding no satisfying answer.
8:00
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Today's goal is to check the state of the 12th floor. Frankly, i don't know who lives here but we'll see.
I take a cold shower, breakfast and then i gear up and take my now 30% battery phone;
I use the light and i get out this time i don't hesitate, i check the peephole and then i open the door. Still trembling and with a dangerously high heartbeat rate. I get on the staircase and get down one floor.
I am on the 13th floor now.
Then with a cold sweat, i get down step by step and finally arrive before the 12th-floor door.
I don't hesitate or take a breath with newfound determination.
I opened the door slightly and i froze.
Before me a back, a human back, or is it? I can hear the growl, i hastily but nonetheless stealthily close the door and catch a silent breath.
Its back hunched in an awkward, jerky way, its bones creaking like dry twigs snapping. A horrible stench , the rot of decaying flesh so overpowering I have to fight the urge to run away.
My hands are moist, i am trembling. This is a zombie.
I should have taken more precautions and waited to see if i could hear anything on the other side to open the doors. I was so stupid!
I try to calm myself.
If we see the good side, i didn't see me and it has its back turned to me so maybe i can knock him with my bar into the end before he realizes i am here.
Yeah, let's do that.
I am confident i can have him if i am quick and precise in my strike.
I breathe in and out to try to prepare myself. I get up, open the door entirely, and focus on the zombie before the front door.
I see it his back is still open to me. I tighten my clutch on the bar and i go in a few steps and swing it at its head.
My metal bar hit the head and crushed it against the wall.
It was a success i felt the exhilarating feeling of adrenaline coursing through my veins. Then i hear footsteps behind me 2 meters behind.
I hastily turn back but by mistake, i let go of the bar in the head of the zombie that slides toward the ground.
I am stricken by fear as i see dimly lit by the exit sign, another zombie walking toward me albeit slowly is hand trying to catch me, he is very close. I push him, and he falls down in this brief moment i try to take back my metal bar but it is stuck in the skull, i can't take it out!
The zombie is trying to get up but i stomp on its head, but he isn't dead, he grab my leg and scratches it with its rotten hand and then i stomp on his head once more, and again and again, and then at last he stop moving.
At the same moment, i unwillingly let out a slight smile.
I felt proud, for the first time in my life, i fought for my life and won. This has a primal and natural feeling to it. Like fighting animals in the wild to survive and get back home at the dawn of man.
I didn't check the corner by the elevator what a stupid mistake, i won't do this mistake again.
I look at my shoe it's coated in a strange red-orange mix of blood and flesh, it's disgusting it makes me flinch and almost vomit.
-"To think I'll need to do this on a regular basis from now on, this world is really a tough one. argh."
I look at the corpses, they seem human. What is human anyway? They are human to me.
-"So to remain human in this world you need to commit murder what a joke Ha Ha..."
Having a little mental break i get on my knees and laugh silently swimming in darkish blood.
I wipe my face with my sleeve, but the tears keep coming. I hate how I feel right now—nauseated, disgusted with myself. But worse, I can't stop the sick thrill coursing through my veins, the adrenaline pumping, making me feel alive. How could I feel alive after that?
"Why did it happen … i want to go back to how it was before."
I took the metal bar out of the skull and i go home.
I showered and washed my clothes.
Why is surviving so difficult? Because of the supply i thought, yeah sure it's hard, but living with the monster that you see in the mirror knowing that's still the best version of you considering the circumstances, it's so hard how can one live alone a life killing, no actually i hate myself so much not because i killed but because i liked it, the thrill of the combat the discharge of adrenaline and dopamine in the brain when i finished,...them that was so good.
Who are the real monsters? The ones who were turned into one or the ones who turn themselves into one?
While still in shock i bandaged my leg just above the ankle, there was a scratch, am i infected, or is a scratch not enough?
-"I remember all those zombie movies, where a scratch was a death sentence. But that was fiction, right? Or was it? I try to remember the rules, but everything's blurry now, mixed up with real blood and death."
While thinking about it i eat by reading a fantasy novel to relax. And spend the rest of the day cleaning my base.