NARUTO POV:
Naruto and Jiraiya stared at the remnants of the wall in front of them.
"That's... that's probably Tsunade's handiwork" Jiraiya said as he turned to a nearby civilian to ask for some information.
"She's definitely here" Jiraiya said with hardened eyes "and from what that guy said, so is Orochimaru."
"JIRAIYA!?"
"TSUNADE!?"
The 4(+tonton, so 4.5) sat at Tsunade's booth, talking about nothing.
Tsunade's apprentice looked really uncomfortable, so Naruto decided to break the ice.
"So we uh, getting anything to eat?"
'Smooth, kid.'
'The hell am I even supposed to say dattebayo?'
"Why are you here, and who is this brat?" Tsunade asked without preamble "he looks a lot like your last student, don't tell me he's your new pupil?"
Jiraiya blinked, before bringing out his usual grin
"Got it right in one, Tsunade! Yeah, this is my student, Naruto Uzumaki."
"Nice to meet you, Tsunade-sama" Naruto bowed respectfully.
"You've never shown me this much respect" Jiraiya said outraged "you a see a pretty face, and suddenly you're goody two shoes!?"
"I'd have been respectful with you too if I didn't see your pervyness 4 seconds after meeting you dattebayo."
Tsunade snorted into her drink.
"Well, he's definitely not too dull if he's already going back and forth with you, and is that a chunin vest I see?"
"Yes" Naruto said, switching to formal mode immediately "My whole team was promoted during the recent Chunin exams."
"Anyway" Jiraiya said "let's get back to the reason we're here. Tsunade, I'm sure you've heard about the attack on Konoha Orochimaru did. Sensei and I beat him off, but the old man got hit, bad."
"I know that Orochimaru already probably came to meet with you, either to get fixed up just to recruit, but please."
He looked straight at Tsunade's startled eyes "come back to Konoha as the 5th hokage."
Tsunade just stared at him for a second for a second before...
"HAHAHAHAHHAHAHA"
She let out a peal of laughter before taking another huge drink from her mug.
"You must be crazy" she said, any trace of humor now gone "if you think I'm going back to that place, especially for a job as wretched as the Hokage position."
"What's wrong with being Hokage?" Naruto let out without realizing.
"What's wrong?" She said, borderline ranting now "that job is made for fools who want to die. A job that takes everything from them and those who they care for. Only a fool would ever want to be Hokage."
"Well I'm gonna be Hokage!" Naruto said defiantly "and I won't let you badmouth the ones that came before me."
She gave a small gasp at his comment, before suddenly glaring at him
"You were being respectful till now so I thought you were alright, but clearly you're as dumb as your master."
"Oi! Don't bring me into this!" Jiraiya protested.
"Tsunade-sama, we should really..."
"No, Shizune." Tsunade rejected "I'm dealing with this impudent brat right now."
"Why don't we step outside" Naruto said with fire in his eyes "I'm sure it's time for your walk, granny."
Jiraiya just shook his head
"The one thing I told him not to say" he muttered "the one thing."
"Sure, kid" Tsunade said with a bloodthirsty grin "I guess it falls to me to teach you a lesson on respect since Jiraiya won't."
"First one to land a good hit wins" Shizune declared "Please don't go overboard"
Tsunade tightened her obi "I'll only use one finger for this."
Naruto shrugged off his Chunin vest and handed it to a shadow clone "Place whatever restriction you want, just don't complain when you end up losing."
In a burst of speed, Naruto dashed straight ahead, left arm cocked back for a punch and his right arm reaching out to grab Tsunade.
Tsunade reacted quickly, dashing to the side before turning and thrusting her finger right into his back.
Or where his back should have been, because where he should have been was nothing but air.
Feeling the air shift, she rolled forward and narrowly avoided the kick that cracked the ground she had just been on.
"This is the famous Tsunade of the Sannin?" Naruto questioned "A granny that just dodges?"
Before Tsunade could retort, she had swipe her hand back to attack the Naruto behind her while the one taunting her turned to smoke.
"RASENGAN!" Naruto roared as he brought his hand forward to end the match.
Tsunade's eyes widened, and she had to jump back again to avoid getting hit by the Jutsu.
"Rasengan?" she gasped "how the hell is a brat like you using the fourth's jutsu?"
"Not just that" he declared as he brought both his hands together before opening them slightly to reveal a tiny Rasengan between.
Jiraiya's eyes widened.
"Naruto! That is seriously an overreaction!"
"She started it!" Naruto yelled back "and I know for a fact this won't kill her if she's half as strong as you!"
Slowly, the Rasengan turned pitch black, and black chakra started swirling around Naruto's entire arm.
"Well then, care to face my Kuroana?"(black hole)
"As if" Tsunade snorted "You can act all you want, but It's obvious that your little experiment is unstable."
"All I need to do is…" she began before suddenly appearing in front of him "this."
She brought her finger towards it, only for Naruto to pull his still clasped hands back and elbow her in the face with all the speed he could muster.
Tsunade blinked.
"Does this mean I win?" Naruto asked Shizune, who looked just as shocked as the now fuming Tsunade.
"It means I beat you up now" she growled before punching him straight in the stomach.
With a huge gust of wind, Naruto was sent flying.
While the clone whistled at the distance the original had just travelled, Shizune rushed forward to heal the young blonde.
"He still won though, he landed the first hit and you used your whole hand just now" the clone pointed out.
"Shut up" Tsunade growled before punching it out and throwing the chunin vest at Naruto.
"I'll accept my loss this time" Naruto said as he thanked Shizune with a nod before standing up "it was dumb of me to think you'd actually keep your word."
"What did you say you-"
"How about another wager." Naruto interrupted "If I'm able to stabilize and use my kuroana properly, then you come back to Konoha and heal the old man. You can get lost after that for all I care, because there's no way I'll accept you as Hokage."
She stood there for a second before smirking.
"You're on. And just for a bonus, I'll throw in this necklace too" she said, pointing at the crystal hanging around her neck "how's that?"
"Whatever" Naruto said dismissively "not really a jewelry guy, but I'll take it I guess."
"And when you lose the bet, I'll be taking all the money you have, and that chunin vest too."
With that, the bet was made.