(Special Credit to Honoured_Writer for the Beta Reading Labor!)
The Kuoh Academy Cafeteria.
A prestigious place of dining fitting a prestigious school such as this.
Clean and orderly, the place was now at its peak as lunch break was in session.
Michelin-star-level nutritious meals are offered completely free of charge for students of Kuoh Academy.
It was to such a degree that some of the more perverted bunch of boys who enrolled simply for the sake of... finding a girlfriend, forgot themselves in a state of food bliss.
All thanks to the totally not suspicious outlandish budget this school has that would raise the eyebrow of a man of common sense.
Like the self-proclaimed paragon of common sense dining on his lonesome, drawing peculiar glances with his... fascinating method of sustaining himself.
...
He was eating Miso Soup with a pair of chopsticks.
-Ren POV-
A fascinated tone from one of the many herds of females attending lunch like myself, caught my ear, "H-How is he doing that?"
Fantastic question my clueless yet curious 3rd Year Nakano Rei!
Yes! I did memorize the names of all attendees of Kuoh High and College for the sake of Deception.
To answer her question, by utilizing my [Intermediate Tier Human Physique] I grab a great many droplets of soup and swiftly insert them into my mouth!
Normally, it'd be a painfully slow way of consuming the soup, however now I showcase...
A feat beyond conventional Humanity!
A feat of AURAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
[+4 Aura Points!]
Marvelous...
My hand moves like a blur, as I expertly and routinely grasp as many droplets as I can, and repeat the motion to fill enough for an elegant gulp.
An Aura Farmer farms even when dining, such is the correct way of life.
However, Mighty Aura Gods from above... I come bearing unfortunate news.
I pause in my consumption, to direct a look at the not-so-subtle looks sent my way from a coalition of rather influential figures of this educational institute.
The Curious Quartet of:
Rias Gremory.
Akeno Himejima.
Sona Shitori.
Tsubaki Shinra.
Immediately noticing my short gaze, Akeno's lips curl into a mischievous and curious smile as she waves at me with familiarity.
The weight of their looks seemed to grow with each passing moment; beneath their calm and confident facades, the growing frustration and perplexion felt exquisite.
Because the Aura was exquisite.
[+1 Aura Points!]
The feeling of my very soul being appraised, and knowing that their search was repeatedly coming up empty was clear from both my Perfect Skill and the mounting frustration.
Not bothering to let my gaze linger on the quartet, I huff as my lips curl into a practiced professional enigmatic, and knowing smirk.
Indeed, only one of Divine Origins the likes of an Aura God could tell by my knowing smirk that I, in fact...
Know nothing.
Yesterday's research on my Windows XP supercomputer resulted in absolutely nothing much to my subtle dismay.
Devils, Fallen Angels, and Angels, as well as other Biblical beings or figures, popped up easily enough in my research.
But the results were limited to:
(1) Rudimentary explanations.
(2) Methods of contact for all three except the Fallen Angels, or so I could discern - Church recruitment forums, Devil Summoning to grant a wish.
That's all of it.
It's either the information is heavily suppressed and limited to physical writing, an example would be the Vaults Of The Vatican if I had to hazard a guess.
Or the information is more widely available on some kind of supernatural internet that I have no access to...
Unfortunate. But an Aura Farmer remains calm at all times except when his Aura is threatened - even then he keeps a calm exterior!
It is with this predicament and infuriating lack of information that I will have to resort once more to Deception in my coming confrontation with the supernatural of my school.
Aura Farming Technique #2... your time has come.
But before I leave for my stage, I must proceed as usual.
Rising up from my lone table in an elegant and smooth rise, I grabbed my tray - now carrying only an empty soup bowl and a rice bowl long since cleared and approached the working staff cafeteria lady - we just call her Oba-san.
"I'll take that, how was the meal, Ren-kun?" She smiled warmly as she took my tray.
"Exquisite as always, Oba-san." I started as I swiftly and smoothly withdrew a pre-prepared 300 yen bill from my fingers - a sleight-of-hand trick I learned from an internet magician.
She smiled awkwardly at my kind gesture, "I told you already, the food here is for free."
"And I say to you again, good service shall always be met with good pay." I asserted firmly, as I put the bill on the tray.
"...Is this even your money, Ren?"
I answered without an ounce of hesitation and a confident smile, "But of course."
I lied.
It's a small piece of what's left of my birthday pay.
[+1 Aura Points]
All obey the law of equivalent exchange.
Though, I couldn't help but notice a glaring yet predictable absence.
Hyoudou is strangely absent.
Not for his usual perverted routine with his fellow stooges, that'd be impossible.
Spying on the Kendo Club is their favorite pastime and that club is only in the latter half of the curriculum, it's the same story with the Tennis and Swim Club.
I see, I understand it now.
Just as expected, they had gotten to him.
-------------------------------
-Third Person POV-
The first-year Class 1-B was at near-full attendance, as the bell was moments away from ringing to signify the end of Lunch Period and the continuation of Classes.
Yet, a sudden racket, pandemonium even, had suddenly sprung up; loud and disturbingly enthusiastic outcries of longing less generously described as - thirsty directed at the source of said chaos:
"KIBA-SENPAI! MARRY ME!"
"KYAAAA KIBA-SENPAI CAME JUST TO SEE ME!"
"HAVE MY BABIES!"
A young blonde and more than conventionally attractive boy stood with a charming and friendly smile at the door leading into the class. Such a being was undeniably a novelty in this feminine den of starving hormone-filled beasts.
Yuuto Kiba, the Prince Of Kuoh Academy.
Raising his arms in a placating gesture, Kiba's lips parted greeting them with a soft tone, "I'm just here to get someone, no need to-"
"TO GET WHO?!"
"YOU CAN GET ME AT ANY-"
Failing to get the hint, Kiba only chuckled lightly, realizing his attempt at calming the famished mob only seemed to intensify the enthusiastic flame - with a resolved gaze he proceeded to pass through the wall of girls.
Who, despite longing for the blonde Prince Of Kuoh, had some kind of semblance of common sense and etiquette and let him pass in peace.
His steps were muffled by the outcries of the mob, yet oddly audible given the sheer presence he exuded as he approached... a peculiar fellow.
Upon recognition of Kiba's target, it's as if a splash of cold water had been splashed upon all the fanatical 1st year girls sobering them up nigh instantaneously from their hypnotized state.
"N-No way!"
Shock.
"HE'LL INFECT HIM WITH CHUUNI! GET AWAY KIBA-SENPAI!"
Dismay.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
Horror.
The warnings went on deaf ears, as Kiba reached the infamous window seat, which held the infamous...
Talented Chuuni And Known Eccentric.
Ren Kobayashi.
Sitting on the air with his questionably impressive core strength.
His lips set in a stern thin line, a profound gaze directed beyond the window and at the distant mountain just outside of Kuoh where an old, abandoned church stands to this day.
An enigmatic sentence left his parted lips, "It is with the advent of a single mystery, that one's peace is disturbed, that one discovers how little he knows."
Kiba's practiced and professional smile faltered for a moment at that sentence, as Ren turned around to meet Kiba's own ocean-blue eyes Ren's enigmatic honey-colored eyes that only loosely hid a raging flame of obsession.
Ren's lips lifted to a knowing smile to complete his sentence, "Wouldn't you agree, Kiba-senpai?"
Kiba readjusted his smile, "Maybe, your words do make sense-"
"THEY DO?!" One of the girls interrupted the 'legendary' confrontation.
Ignoring her, Kiba continued, "But I came to escort you to President Shitori."
Ren's expression lacked any hint of surprise, "My perfect attendance?"
"It will be taken care of," Kiba answered immediately with a nod.
A soft chuckle escaped Ren's lips, as if amused by the whole situation, uneasing the stoic Kiba slightly as he rose up with a nod.
There was a hint of mocking, yet paradoxically, polite respect in his tone - something Kiba couldn't make heads or tails of:
"Lead on, then. Oh, valiant Knight."
-------------------------------
-Ren POV-
He does give off a bit of a Knight vibe, doesn't he?
As I followed the renowned Prince Of Kuoh Academy through the hallways, I had yet to receive the Aura Points for my endeavor - but it is obvious the Secondary Camera scene appeared far from over.
And it was at this very moment that something...
Extraordinary occurred.
[Advice LVL MAX activated!]
?!
I stopped in my tracks at the unexpected activation of the Aura Farming System.
"Kobayashi-san?" Kiba's perplexed tone fell on deaf ears.
[Transmiting the Top Three of the inserted Aura Gods' advice to the User!]
M-MY LORDS?!
[1. An aura farmer must train at all times and show their weakness as a self-imposed limit. An example of this excellent aura farming technique is weighted clothing.]
[2. The most efficient way to make devils respect you is to dare to say loudly "God" in front of them.]
[3. To confuse your enemy, you must first confuse yourself. But never let your enemy know you are confused. When they are questioning their sanity, act like they are the mad ones. When an aura farmer is confused, thus is the fabric of reality confused as well.]
...
DIVINE PROVIDENCE!
UNFILTERED WISDOM FROM THE GODS THEMSELVES!
I THANK THEE!
I THANK THEE!
I THANK THEE!
"K-Kobayashi-san? Why are you... crying?" Kiba stood frozen with a gobsmacked expression.
Seeing the sudden and from his perspective unprompted; waterfall of tears flowing down the still figure of Ren.
...
Ren replied to the bewildered mixture of worry and confusion with the only right answer as he elegantly wiped his tears with his sleeve:
"God."
Prompting a sudden wince and pained cringe to seize Kiba's bearing, only serving to stump him further.
To Be Continued!
-Author Note Start-
No, I did not confuse Sona for Rias, Kiba is fetching Ren to both of them cause he's a point of interest for both since their the rulers of Kuoh and whatnot.
Is bout it.
Also, the [Advice] skill will only activate to send Ren your most liked advice or so you can send more advice whenever... I feel like it lmao.
It won't be a common thing you can't help him that much.
Could it be classified as plot armor or a tool for funny or both?
Yes, because it is.
Do I look like I care?
No.
Bu bye love ya!