Day 700:
Lately I haven't had much to do, a few months ago I searched the abandoned hut of the uncle who was sacrificed.
However I found nothing, there was only a drawing of something like a square, inside that square were drawn some plants and outside the square nothing was drawn, it was simply painted black.
It was a bit curious, but I didn't give it any importance.
By the way, mom says that soon she will be able to take me hunting in the forest on the surface, maybe I can see the end of the world that mom found.
Written by Cemar
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"Lord Ferr..." Any's light, soft voice brings me out of my reading, I turn my head slightly to the right to observe her delicate figure and face.
"That's my mother's diary..." Any says as she looks at the diary wistfully, I smile at her in response and offer her the book but she takes a few steps away.
"The diary scares me," Any mutters as she stares at the diary, I open my mouth in slight surprise before sighing and putting the diary away in my clothes.
I look at Any who still seems to be half asleep and get up, I take a few steps towards her and start to tousle her hair with a smile.
"Why?, I mean, Why are you afraid of your mother's diary?" Any raises her head slightly at my question, her bright light eyes focus on mine and she smiles slightly.
"Reading it fills you with something strange, a feeling of emptiness that I can't explain, I feel as if everything in the world ceases to matter, and only an immense emptiness of absolute darkness takes over me," Any murmurs, her bright eyes look like it's about to release tears and she takes slow steps towards me.
"Mom... she was crazy, Right?" Any asks as she hugs me gently.
I for my part continue to rub her hair, I like my new height, I mean, outside the Terrarium even the girls are bigger than me.
Coming to the terrarium not only my body is different and became bigger, but also several things were written in my mind, among them a lot of general knowledge about the world and how humanity works.
"Actually... she looks to me like she wasn't crazy, "I say as I feel Any's warm embrace.
"Sorry for calling you ugly the first time I tried to talk to you, I didn't know that you were... well, you know," Any apologizes, for my part I just shake my head.
"It's okay... just go back to your room to sleep," I murmur lightly, Any nods before watching the Champions rest.
Her eyes focus on the green skull in the middle of all the skulls, Any smiles slightly before muttering something under her breath and finally sighing.
"Mom's home now, Right?" Any mutters as she kneels down in front of the Champions Rest.
I also look at Cemar's skull nailed to a stake before replying, "Actually, yes...", I reply, not really knowing what happened to Cemar, she said she had to go back to the place where the world was created.
Although if I remember correctly I think they told me that the stakes contain the souls of the people whose skull was nailed on top of it, so I don't really know what happened to Cemar's soul.
"Mom wanted to escape from this world, I... I wasn't enough to fill the emptiness of her heart", Any lowers his head, "I tried several times, trying to win her love but, I guess I never succeeded," Any seems to smile lightly.
"She always thought of you, Lord Ferr, maybe I should hate you for always occupying a place in mom's mind, but... I just hope it's okay now," Any finally says before lowering her head slightly towards the Champions Rest.
"Actually, I think Cemar was in love with the former Lord of this place," I think to myself as I listen to Any's words.
"Anyway... thanks... mom," Any mumbles between slight sobs in the direction of Cemar's skull, I don't know if it was my slightly blurred vision or my distraction from Any's words but I think I saw Cemar's skull glow slightly with a green hue for an instant.
"Kivea was right, I just didn't want to accept it, mom did commit suicide," Any whispers, some tears fall from her eyes to the earth, moistening it, "I was just trying to fool myself, the evidence was obvious, but, I wanted to hold on to my mother no matter what..." Any finally murmurs with sadness and acceptance before standing up slightly, she half turns and watches me with a smile that she barely tries to keep on her face.
"Lord Ferr, Do you have a mother?" Any asks as she swallows saliva and watches me with her bright, wet eyes.
I watch her for a moment, I say nothing, I simply watch this girl, in fact, I do have a mother, she has always cared for me.
"Yes...," I reply, Any forces the smile even tighter on her face as she gasps for breath.
"And does your mother love you?"ç Any asks, her breathing completely agitated, her eyes almost blurry, her frail body on the verge of collapse.
"Yes..." again I answer without adding any additional words, Any licks her lips lightly, she forcing her smile looks me in the eyes and swallows saliva again.
"I'm happy for that..." Any mumbles before lowering her head, I honestly know what to say to her, her feelings are in a chaotic state, she falters as she walks towards me again.
Any simply hugs me again until she falls asleep, and again I carry her back to her hut to lay her on a nearby bed.
However, before I can retire Any grabs one of the corners of my clothes.
"Lord Ferr, Can you stay and sleep with me?" Any murmurs, her grip on my clothing is frail, her voice timid and shaky and she does not have the courage to look me in the eye.
I, however, don't have to think much, Any seems to be mentally unstable, I simply bend down to hug her lightly before falling asleep next to her.
....
...
...
"You are suffering for some reason... I mean... your nervous system is alert, and your mind is a mess..." I hear the gruff voice of an older man not far from me, opening my eyes slightly I decide to get up.
"Are you awake?", a white-robed, bald, old man asks as he is looking at me.
"I...", I mumble while looking at the old man, that dream has lasted toeo long, but, the best thing sems to be not to think about that dream for the moment, by the way, Who is this old man?
"I'm the head-doctor of this barracks, you can call me Deva," the old man introduces himself with a smile before moving a little closer to my bed.
"Did you have any nightmares?" Deva asks curiously, sitting down on a chair not far from my bed.
I, for my part just squint slightly, I don't think for long before answering, "Actually, no...", I smile in Deva's direction.
"I see, so, Did you dream about something maybe?" Deva asks, his eyes focused on mine, his expression curious.
"I... no," I don't look away from Deva's eyes.
I watch him as he purses his lips and then smiles broadly.
"You're lying, I've been watching you for a couple of hours now, your mind was working much harder than a mind at rest, besides, you made several expressions and mumbled something about wanting to go back to a place," Deva finishes his words with a slight sigh.
"Actually, I don't care if you were dreaming or having a nightmare, the truth is that your body suffers damage constantly," Deva speaks with absolute seriousness.
"It's... strange, I mean, obviously there's no one beating you or "breaking your heart", but... your organs are aging at an alarming rate," Deva pauses to take some water from a glass nearby.
"Your heart already functions like the heart of a thirty twenty-five year old man, the same with all your organs, this is... bad considering you should be approximately sixteen or seventeen years old," Deva touches his chin as if in thought.
"Your mind is under constant stress, I don't want to jump to conclusions because I really don't know what could be affecting you, but, it's like your mind is in a survival mode or something...," Deva looks away slightly to observe a small candle on the wall not too far away.
"If it continues like this you will die at age thirty or less from mental and physical exhaustion, well... more mental exhaustion than physical, but still... hehehe," Deva touches his forehead for some reason.
"In normal times I could offer you an invitation to investigate your case and I could pay you well, but, we are at war, I have neither the equipment nor the people needed to investigate your case... it's really a pity," Deva's face distorts with a slightly mocking grimace as he shakes his head.
I simply watch Deva, analyzing his previous words... mental stress, wear and tear on my internal organs, only those dreams could be the cause, and dying at age thirty or younger.
That doesn't really worry me, even if I only have ten years of life remaininig, I guess it's something that comes with age.
"Thank you for your words, Deva..." I mutter with a real smile on my face, Deva pats one of his thighs before saying "Good!!!, that's the attitude of a warrior..."
Deva stands up and begins to pull something out of one of his pockets in his tunic.