I woke up with my face half-buried in the pillow, sunlight poking through the curtains like it had a personal vendetta against my eyeballs.
Peaceful morning?
Yeah, no.
Because guess what?
Erza was watching TV. Again.
Volume up. Legs crossed like some queen on a throne. Completely absorbed like she was binge-watching her new religion.
Meanwhile, Elena—my sweet little girl—was curled up beside me, sleeping like an angel. How she managed that, I'll never know.
I sat up, scratching my head, trying to wrap my still-sleepy brain around this madness.
Three. Freaking. Days.
That's how long it's been since Erza—an actual dragon from another world—crash-landed into our lives. And somehow, *somehow,* in just three days, she had learned to operate a TV, microwave popcorn, and figured out how to Google things.
Google. Things.
I squinted at her from the bed.
"Hey… Erza?"
She didn't look at me. Just lazily raised an eyebrow without taking her eyes off the screen.
"How do you even know how to use a TV? Like—shouldn't you be panicking over technology or worshipping Alexa or something? I mean, you're from another world! Where's the culture shock?!"
Still no glance. Just that same calm, icy tone:
"Dragon species are fast learners. We adapt faster than any mortal species. That's why we're superior."
Oh.
"Yeah, I noticed," I muttered. "You figured out the toaster, fridge, even my microwave. But somehow you still only make steak."
Silence.
I kept going.
Well… okay then.
"…You really adjusted that fast, huh?"
Finally, she turned her head toward me and gave a smug little smirk.
"Dumbo."
I blinked.
"…Wow. You even learned sarcasm."
This woman—no, this dragon—was going to be the death of me.."
I sighed.
"Okay, okay. Serious question—what kind of dragon are you anyway? You never told me."
She huffed, clearly bothered by the question.
"Why do you want to know?"
"Because we're going to be living together. You know, family. Families don't keep secrets."
She groaned.
"Fine. I'm a Silver Dragon. Wind and fire magic. Second only to Red Dragons in power."
I froze.
"Wait. So… you're one of the strongest species in your world?"
"Obviously," she said, flipping the channel.
"Now, make me breakfast. I'm starving. Half an hour wasted already."
I muttered under my breath, "She acts like a queen but can't even fry an egg…"
THWACK.
A flaming punch landed on my side, and I was flat on the floor.
"OW! You heard that?!"
"Silver dragons have sharp hearing, dumb human," she said smugly.
I groaned, still laying on the floor.
"Great. My apartment is turning into a battlefield. Is it me or did the floor just shake? Wait… was that a mini-earthquake?"
Nope. That was just her punch.
I sat up slowly, dusted myself off, and walked to the kitchen.
"If she wants breakfast, fine. I'll show her how Earthlings cook."
Cue my evil laugh.
"Time to unleash… My cooking skill."
Let her taste my cooking today.
I'm done being the household chef without recognition.
It's time to show the lizard queen what Earth-born culinary skills really taste like.
With an evil grin spreading across my face, I tied on the apron.
"Today's special... Make-Ahead Egg Sandwiches!"
Cue imaginary TV studio lights, dramatic music, and a smug smile to camera.
I toasted the bread to golden perfection, watching it crisp up in the toaster.
Next, I cracked the eggs into the hot pan, making sure to get the perfect balance—crispy edges with a soft, runny middle.
A little salt, a dash of black pepper, and a small smear of mayo.
Simple, but effective. Oh, and don't forget the cheese slice.
A perfect sandwich for my two favorite people.
By the time I plated the sandwiches, the smell had already started to fill the room.
A satisfying, mouth-watering scent.
I could hear Elena stirring in the next room. My tiny three-year-old, the biggest foodie in the house (besides me, of course).
She stumbled into the kitchen, her hair a mess, eyes barely open, still caught in the haze of sleep.
"Papa… what're you making?" she mumbled, rubbing her eyes like she wasn't sure if she was still dreaming.
"Smells good, huh?" I smiled, picking her up and carrying her to the bathroom.
"But first—you gotta brush those teeth, kiddo."
She nodded with a sleepy "Uh-huh," as I helped her freshen up.
As I turned back to the kitchen, I caught a glimpse of Erza, standing near the counter, her cold, violet eyes flicking to the sandwiches.
She didn't say anything—typical for her—but the way she looked at the plates told me everything I needed to know.
She was curious.
Yeah, I knew she wouldn't admit it, but I could practically hear her thoughts.
That looks good. But I'm not going to say anything.
Elena and I returned to the dining table. She plopped down in her seat, her excitement growing.
"Thank you for the food!" she chirped, her hands clasped together in her usual polite, childlike ritual.
"You're welcome, sweetie," I said, grinning. Then I slid one sandwich in front of her.
She eagerly took a bite, her eyes lighting up.
"Wow! Papa! So good! Yummy!"
Her little voice was so full of joy that I couldn't help but laugh. Score one for Earth cuisine.
I glanced over at Erza, still standing off to the side, arms crossed, her eyes narrowing at the sandwich like it was some kind of test.
The air between us shifted just a little, but she didn't say anything.
I decided to be bold.
"My Queen," I said with a mischievous grin.
"Would you like to honor this humble mortal's dish with your royal palate?"
She scoffed, rolling her eyes, but I could tell she was intrigued.
"Hmph. Don't flatter yourself, insect."
Ah, the cold attitude. Classic Erza.
But to my surprise, she grabbed the sandwich and took a bite.
One second passed.
Two seconds.
Then—there it was.
Her violet eyes flickered, a spark of surprise in them. Then, something that looked suspiciously like joy.
"It's… it's good." She whispered it so quietly, I almost didn't hear it.
I couldn't resist. "Not bad for mortal food, huh?"
She quickly regained her usual cold demeanor. "Hmph. It's passable. For mortal food."
I was about to smirk when Elena suddenly shouted, "Daddy! More sandwich!"
Right, I had extras. I handed Elena another sandwich, and she devoured it happily, not even waiting to finish before asking for more.
But then, Erza—still looking at the plate like it was the most confusing thing in the world—muttered,
"I want more too."
Was that… a shy request?
I raised an eyebrow. "Oh? The mighty dragon asks for more?"
She turned her face slightly, avoiding my gaze, but her tone was still the same.
Cold, but with a hint of something different. Something almost like… vulnerability?
I leaned in and whispered with a mischievous grin,
"Sure, but I added a little something extra to this one."
I handed her the next sandwich with a bit more chili powder than the last.
She took one bite, and I almost regretted it.
"Hh-HOT—!!"
She immediately blew a puff of fire, her eyes wide in shock, and I couldn't stop the laugh that bubbled up.
I couldn't resist.
"Aw, come on. Aren't dragons supposed to handle a little heat? I thought you were a superior being?"
Her face turned red—whether from the spice or embarrassment, I wasn't sure—but she glared at me, flames practically crackling around her.
And yet, she didn't stop. She ate the whole thing, tears gathering in her eyes, but she refused to let me see her struggle.
Finally, after finishing, she put the sandwich down and, with a huff, muttered, "It wasn't… *that* bad."
I leaned back in my chair, giving her a sly grin. "So, you liked it?"
Erza just turned her head away, the barest hint of a smile tugging at the corner of her lips, but she'd never admit it out loud.
Elena, completely oblivious to the silent battle that just unfolded, waved her sandwich in the air.
"Daddy! More, please!"
I looked at Erza, whose fiery eyes were still lingering on the last bite of her sandwich.
"You know, I think you might have a little soft spot for Earth food after all."
She didn't answer me, but the spark in her eyes said enough.
So yeah. Earth cuisine – 1, Dragon pride – 0.
And I think I just made her a tiny bit less cold-hearted. Maybe.
Erza Face turn in dark as she was thinking something .
[Erza – POV]
This mortal bug…
He dares to serve me that—a meal so spicy it scorched my royal tongue and nearly made me breathe fire in front of our daughter.
Intolerable. Unforgivable.
He grinned like a jester playing king, reveling in his little prank.
Pathetic.
I dabbed my lips with a cloth, calm and composed, but my eyes… they gleamed with quiet wrath.
"I see…" I murmured, standing slowly, posture straight, voice low and cold. "So you've chosen death by spice."
He flinched. As he should.
I turned, my cloak fluttering behind me with royal flair, and walked away without another word. But in my heart…
I was already planning his downfall.
Not with blades. Not with flame.
But with quiet torment—drawn out, precise, and deliciously inconvenient.
He will suffer.
Misplaced clothes. Soaked bedsheets. Ice-cold water during his bath. Maybe even a teleportation trap into the garden pond.
A Queen's wrath is never loud.
It is art.
[Yuuta – POV]
"Papa… why is Mommy laughing like that?" Elena asked, still chewing her sandwich, her face scrunched in confusion.
I gulped.
"That's… her revenge mode, sweetheart."
And I am definitely in trouble... :(
[End of chapter]
"Author's Gift Scene!"
[Scene: Morning. Kitchen. Yuuta and Erza are mid-argument. Elena is sitting at the table, legs dangling, clutching her plushie.]
Yuuta(annoyed): You always act like you're right!
Erza(coldly): That's because I usually am, mortal bug.
Elena(voice small): Papa… Mama… is Elena not cute?
[Both freeze. The air grows still.]
Yuuta: Huh? What are you talking about, pumpkin?
Elena(holds up tablet): See… this… sniff… readers are reading, but they're not adding to collection… sniff… maybe they don't like Elena…
[Yuuta and Erza lean in, looking at the Webnovel stats.]
Erza(eyes narrow): Reader count… effective reader count… but no collection?
Yuuta(dramatic gasp): No collection?!
Erza(cold fury): They dare insult my daughter…?
Yuuta(pulls Elena into a hug): No, sweetie! You're too cute. That's the problem. They can't handle your adorableness so they forget to hit the collection button!
Elena(sniffle): R-Really?
Erza(places royal hand on Elena's head): I shall make them kneel in regret… or at least press the damn collection icon.
Yuuta(points at camera like in a sitcom): You heard the ladies and Gentlemen. Don't make the dragon mama angry. Hit that collection button!
[Freeze frame. Upbeat music plays. End scene.]