I woke up to someone chanting a healing spell above me, which—let me tell you—is not the ideal alarm clock. Like, where's the sunshine? Where's the birds chirping? Why does my spine feel like it got punted by a Cryo war criminal in six-inch heels?
Oh right.
Because it did.
"Ughhh... what time is it? Dinner already?" I groaned, peeling one eye open like it weighed 300 pounds. Spoiler. It did. Emotionally.
"It's still morning," Barbara said sweetly.
Morning? Nah. Couldn't be. The pain in my ribs said 'Wednesday.'
Lumine was already up, of course, looking as flawless as ever, like she didn't just 1v2 the Fatui a while ago. She glanced at me and immediately gave that "I can't believe I have to babysit this clown again" look.
She walked over and nudged me with her boot. "Get up. We've got work to do."
"Lumine, please," I wheezed. "At least let me die dramatically under the sunrise."
"No."
Fair.
Barbara, ever the gentle healer, explained she found us all collapsed near the cathedral steps—me, Lumine, and our popsicle fairy Paimon. Still thawing out, by the way. Poor floating gremlin. I'm 78% sure she was mumbling about grilled fish in her unconscious state.
Lumine filled in the rest. Fatui attacked. Big scary lady. Gnosis stolen. Venti got decked. Shigeru got turned into emotional sashimi.
I nodded sagely. "Sounds about right." Then I dusted myself off -read: flailed around painfully,- and said, "Alright. Let's be done with this mess already."
Lumine raised an eyebrow. "What are you talking about?"
"I know where the bard is," I said, grinning like a guy who definitely wasn't about to walk into more trauma. "Lumine, let's go."
Then I turned to Barbara, gave her a wink, and dropped the suavest line known to man.
"Later, cutie."
She stared at me.
Like I was an expired potato. Possibly one that talked.
Rizz? 0.
Dignity? still in the negatives.
Paimon coughed awkwardly as we left. "You really thought that would work?"
"I dunno, I thought I had some charm left."
"You used it all up the moment you faceplanted into a staircase."
Touché.
As we headed out, I started thinking aloud. Dangerous pastime, I know.
"I mean, I am good-looking, right? Is it the hair? The face? My near-death charisma?"
Paimon sighed loudly, arms crossed. "She looked at you like that because you're a weirdo, Shigeru. Even Paimon would shiver if you approached her like that."
"That's just the power of my mystique," I said smugly.
"That's the power of making people uncomfortable," Lumine mumbled.
"Pfft. Tomato, tomahto."
Cue the usual back and forth. Lumine threatening to leave me behind. Paimon roasting me like I'm tonight's dinner. Me making finger guns at confused civilians.
Mondstadt mornings, baby.
We finally reached it—the giant tree. The Symbol of Mondstadt's Hero. Big. Majestic. Kinda leafy. Smelled like ancient pinecones and philosophical regret.
And under its branches stood the bard himself. Venti.
He looked... tired. No jokes. No wine bottle. Just standing there, eyes distant.
"The winds amongst the branches is good," he muttered softly. "I love the way it smells."
Then he turned, spotted us, and gave a small smile. "I said the exact same thing last time."
He sighed. "Why do I only say these things when I'm down on my luck?"
Lumine stepped forward. "Venti... what is a Gnosis?"
Venti didn't answer right away.
Instead, he looked up at the leaves dancing in the breeze. A moment passed. Then two. Finally, he said, "I'm just thankful you all came. That Dvalin still chose to fulfill his duty as one of the Four Winds..."
He smiled faintly. "I told him he could choose freedom. Any freedom. And this is the freedom he chose. Protecting this land."
There was a weight in his voice. Real gratitude. Real loss. It hit different when the jokers stop joking, you know?
"I never wanted to force my idea of freedom onto anyone," Venti said. "That wouldn't be freedom at all."
Lumine looked like she wanted to ask more—but then Venti turned to me.
Me. The one still emotionally concussed from yesterday.
"He," Venti said, pointing a finger at me with that annoying bard grin, "seems to know more than I do."
I blinked. "Heh? Me?"
"Some of the answers I couldn't give you," he added, "he probably could."
I scratched my head. "How could you say something like that?"
Venti chuckled. "Because I know you do... You probably know me more than I know myself."
...
I didn't have a joke for that one.
That hit a little too real.
For a second, it felt like the world paused—like the winds themselves were listening in. The leaves rustled softly overhead, echoing that strange silence.
Me? I just stared at him.
And I smiled.
"Yeah," I said quietly. "Maybe I do."
Venti and I locked eyes. It wasn't just a casual glance anymore—we were sizing each other up. You ever look at someone and feel like there's a full-on mental chess game happening behind the silence? Yeah. That. It wasn't hostile, though. Just... layered. A bard and a clown pretending not to know too much. Only one of us was actually pretending.
Then Venti, still smiling like the playful breeze he always rode on, said quietly, "I think you know where you need to go next, right?"
I gave him a slow nod. Yeah, I did. Of course I did. There's a rhythm to this world, and once you hear the beat, it's hard not to dance along.
Before I could walk off, I glanced at Lumine. "Go ahead," I said, "Head on first. I'll catch up. The bard and I need to... vibe."
She narrowed her eyes. Suspicious as hell. Paimon, too. But they nodded and left us alone under the towering tree, the wind whistling like it knew secrets we didn't.
Once they were gone, the air got heavier. Not in a bad way—just... significant.
Venti still had that gentle smile, but there was steel underneath it now. "So. How much do you know?"
I crossed my arms, letting the wind play with my jacket.
"A lot," I said truthfully. "But not enough. I know what's coming. What's been set in motion. I know about the Seven Nations... Except Snezhnaya. That place's foggier than a Liyue morning after a heavy rain."
He hummed. "Figures."
Then he tilted his head at me, that smile morphing into curiosity. "You're not just an ordinary outlander, are you? Probably someone who's observed Teyvat for a long while now."
I didn't confirm or deny. What would be the point?
"Tell me then," Venti asked softly, "Why haven't you told the Traveler everything? About Teyvat? About her brother?"
I looked at him, and for once, dropped the smirk.
"Because I want to experience it. See the story unfold with my own eyes. Not just know it—live it. Feel the weight of each chapter, every heartbreak, every triumph. I want to see all of Teyvat, piece together what's been lost, and what I still don't understand."
Then I stared him down.
"Now, let me ask you a question. What are you hiding? Why act so carefree? Why play the fool when you're clearly anything but? Why pretend to be weak?"
Venti's eyes didn't flinch. But his smile... it faded.
"Because I am."
I scoffed, stepping forward, letting the frustration leak out.
"Weak? Bullshit."
He blinked at the venom in my voice.
"The power of Archons isn't just from your title. It's drawn from your people's faith, from your dominion over your region, and—let's not forget—the Elemental Authorities, stolen from the Seven Dragon Sovereigns by the Heavenly Principles themselves. You're one of the original seven. Next to Morax, you're the most elusive of them all. So tell me, Venti... No... Barbatos... Are you really weak?"
His posture shifted. For once, he didn't look like a bard. He looked like something older. Wiser. Lonelier.
"There are things I must keep secret," he finally said. "You really do know me too well."
I nodded slowly. "I want to know more. I will know more. About the Cataclysm. About Khaenri'ah. About how so many gods fell 500 years ago."
I stepped closer.
"About Aether. The Abyss Prince. Lumine's brother."
Venti tensed—but only slightly. Just enough for me to catch it.
"I know you won't answer now. Not fully. But one day, I'll have my answers. And when that day comes... I just hope I can still look at you as a comrade. As a friend."
He was silent.
Then, like the sun breaking through clouds, his smile returned. A little sadder now. A little more real.
"I sure hope so too."
I grinned. Then extended my hand.
"Before that day ever comes... Let's be friends. For now."
He looked at the hand. Then took it.
The wind rustled again, this time feeling lighter.
Yeah. This was the calm before the storm. But for now, we had a breeze.
And a silent promise that one day, when secrets can no longer stay buried, we'll meet again.
As warriors. As wanderers. Maybe even as brothers-in-arms.
***
Alright! Now walking beside Lumine and Paimon again felt oddly normal, despite the emotional warzone I just survived. You know, the kind where a literal god gives you the "you know too much" look and doesn't smite you for it. Character development, baby.
Lumine glanced sideways at me, her golden eyes sharp. "What did you and Venti talk about?"
I shoved my hands into my pockets, doing my best impression of a guy who didn't just interrogate a thousand-year-old wind deity. "Eh. Just some serious stuff. Y'know, a heart-to-heart between a bard and a badass."
Paimon floated over, squinting. "You mean a weirdo?"
I paused. Considered it. Nodded solemnly. "Yeah… kinda like that. A heart-to-heart between the weirdo and the badass."
Lumine deadpanned, "You're the weirdo, Shigeru."
"Don't worry about the small stuff." I waved her off, because denial is my best friend and I'm not ready to break up yet.
We kept walking. Trees swaying, birds singing, the sun shining in that annoyingly optimistic way. But I could feel it—Lumine was itching to throw a truckload of questions at me like she was prepping for an exam.
So I stopped, turned dramatically like I was in a movie poster, and announced, "You've got questions, right?"
She blinked. "Obviously."
"I already know what you're gonna ask. So buckle up, buttercups. Prepare for another lore bomb, baby!"
Paimon groaned. "Please no."
I ignored her for the greater good of exposition.
"First off, Visions." I pointed at the one dangling from a random passerby's side since neither of us has a Vision. "They're basically divine coupons. A small minority of humans receive them. They grant the ability to manipulate elements, but only if you're dramatic enough to earn one."
Lumine raised a brow. "Dramatic?"
"Exactly. You either have unresolved trauma, a tragic backstory, or an unhealthy obsession with one emotion. Boom, Vision granted."
"That's… kind of accurate," Paimon muttered.
I grinned. "See? Trust the weirdo."
Then I leaned closer, lowering my voice like we were about to drop state secrets.
"Now. A Gnosis. That's the good stuff. An item used by The Seven to connect directly with Celestia. Big divine Wi-Fi. It's the badge of being an Archon. Looks like a chess piece. Super fancy."
"Why would Venti just let someone take his?" Lumine asked.
"Ah, yes. That brings us to the woman who straight-up punted us into next week." I shuddered. "La Signora. Also known as 'that terrifying lady with legs longer than my will to live.' She's number eight of the Fatui Harbingers."
Paimon gasped. "There are eight more of her?!"
"Actually, eleven in total," I said. "The Harbingers are like the Tsaritsa's executive team. Super overpowered. Like if every corporate boss was also a WWE champion."
Lumine blinked. "What's a WWE?"
"Uh… imagine a bunch of muscular guys in tight clothes yelling dramatically and suplexing each other for glory and snacks. But, like, politically charged."
Paimon stared. "What kind of theater do you people have in your world?!"
"A glorious one." I wiped a fake tear. "Anyway! Tsaritsa."
"Cryo Archon. Ice queen of Snezhnaya. Mysterious. Might be collecting all the Gnoses like they're Pokémon cards." I nodded sagely.
"…Poka-what?" Lumine asked.
"Just smile and nod," I whispered. "She's the one Archon I haven't met yet. Maybe in a few more updates."
They both stopped walking.
"...Updates?" Lumine asked slowly.
"What are you talking about?" Paimon added.
I blinked. Smiled. "Don't sweat the small stuff."
They looked deeply concerned. That's normal.
"Anyway," I continued, "some Harbingers are chill. Like, Capitano? Total chad. Just… don't ask too much. We'll probably meet him. Maybe save him. Or punch him. Or both."
"Chad?" Lumine repeated.
"Someone who's, like, ultra cool. Peak vibes. Think… a noble idiot but with abs."
"Oh my Archons," Paimon muttered.
"Thank you," I said, assuming that was a compliment. "So yeah. The Tsaritsa's collecting Gnoses. The others? Well, they're probably just vibing or scheming somewhere. I'll explain more when we're not ten steps from being vaporized again."
Lumine frowned. "So what now?"
"Oh-ho-ho." I grinned. "Now we travel. Observe. Maybe witness a giant sky-lizard faceplant from the stratosphere."
"A… what?"
"Big lizard. Boom. Sky. Drama. It's a thing, trust me."
Paimon blinked. "Is this another one of those 'anime arcs' you keep mentioning?"
"Yes. And it's peak shonen, baby."
"…You make less sense the more you talk," Lumine mumbled.
I raised a fist into the air. "Onward! To Liyue!"
"…Y-Yeah!" Paimon said weakly, raising her tiny hand.
Lumine sighed, but lifted her hand too. "Fine. Let's go."
And like that, Team Chaos was back on the road.
What could possibly go wrong?
...Don't answer that.
_____________________________
End of Chapter 15
Quest Completed: Secrets of Wind, Ice, and WWE Logic
Sub Quest: Confuse the entire party with Earth references at least three times.
Rewards: +500 Lore Dump EXP, +1 "What the hell is a Chad?" moment, and Confusion Multiplier x2 (Lumine & Paimon)
Unlocked Harbinger Profile: La Signora
Unlocked Archon Entry: Tsaritsa of Snezhnaya (Pending future update)