Chapter 2
The sun seeps through my blinds as I wake up. I almost hoped I didn't so I could see him again. All I could think about was him day and night, rain or shine. I wanted him back. I kept thinking back to his funeral. The friend group went together as they walked up to his casket. I stayed back. I couldn't see him the same if I saw him without that dumb smile on his face. I missed it… I missed him a lot.
I roll over, grab my phone to check my notifications, and see a text in our group chat.
Dominic: Hey, we should hang out. It's been a while.
Amy: Yeah, that would be awesome!
I roll back over, setting my phone down.
"No thanks," I say to myself. I didn't want to go out, but my social life definitely needed it. I looked like a vampire from never leaving my room this summer. I got up, rubbing my eyes, holding my face in my palms as I sat on the edge of my bed.
"Breakfast ready!" my mom yells from downstairs as I hear my brother shoot up on the other side of the wall, running downstairs. I giggle slightly to myself. He was such a dork. My brother was the kind of gamer kid who would get picked on for good grades but never do the work. The book-smart kind of guy.
I decided to actually eat this morning before getting up and walking down the stairs.
"God, I'm tired," I say as I walk into the kitchen.
"Maybe you should start going to bed earlier," my mother says, looking at me from over her shoulder.
"I never thought of that," I say, my voice dripping with sarcasm as I grab a plate and sit next to my brother. I dish up some food as my brother grabs another pancake and throws it on my plate.
"You need it," he says, looking at my body.
"Well, thanks for thinking about me." I roll my eyes, looking back at my plate.
"So who were you playing with last night?" I say, referring to his noisy self when I got home.
"Oh, you know, some of the football team," he says, shoving a forkful of pancake in his mouth.
"Oh… nice," I gave him a grossed-out look as he scarfed down more food.
"Like who? Just curious," I say, shrugging as I look at him.
"Oh, you know Max, Jackson, and Kyle," I almost choke as he says the last one. Of all the people he picks to hang out with, it's Kyle!? I honestly can't say I'm surprised because Jackson and Kyle are on the football team together and always hang out. Amy just had to pick a football kid to fall in love with.
"You alright?" My brother says, looking at me confused.
"Yup, I'm great." I get up, giving him my food as I go upstairs, locking my door. I sat on my bed, grabbing my jeans and hoodie before changing. I grab my phone.
Where are we meeting? I text in the group chat.
Hours later the friend group finally met up at our local mall. I always seem to resort back to him. Smith is all I can think about. Suddenly my thoughts are disturbed by Jackson's loud mouth.
"Hey, one of my buddies is having a party tonight, and there's going to be drinks. Want to go?" He looks at us with an excited face, and honestly, a little bit of alcohol in my veins doesn't sound that bad.
"I'm down," I say, pulling out my phone and checking the time before looking at Amy and smirking.
"Fine," she jokingly sighs, rolling her eyes. We all wrapped up our shopping before going back out of the Jackson car. He had the best vehicle, but that's because he has Daddy's money. I'm not going to complain, though, because I'd never ride in a vehicle like this any other way. No one but Jackson really knew where we were going. All we knew was there were drinks and their parents definitely were out of town. Sure, if any of us got caught here, we would probably get our scholarships taken away, but you only live once, right?
We pull up to the house, and it's loud with music and bright with lights from inside.
"They really went all out, huh?" I say as we get out of the car. Dominic opened my door, jokingly acting like I was a princess, and Jackson did the same for Amy as Lilly rolled her eyes, sitting in the middle.
We walk up to the house, sneaking in the front door so we don't spook anyone, making them think we are the cops. Jackson and Amy immediately drift off to the football team, and Lily goes to her other little friend group with Dominic. It felt weird standing there in the middle of the room alone. I felt like everyone was looking at me. I walk into the kitchen where the drinks are, and I pour myself a strong drink. Maybe this is my time to get a break from always thinking about Smith. I walked through the people to a hall that was darker and quieter. I slowly slide down the wall, sitting on the floor.
"Loud, isn't it?" I jump as I look down the wall, seeing a silhouette walk towards me.
"Y-yea… I'm not a fan of parties; my friends just talked me into it." He doesn't need to know that I voluntarily came here for the alcohol, but I wasn't lying; I did hate parties.
"I mean, I kind of agree. The whole party thing isn't really my vibe. My friends just really wanted me to throw one since my parents weren't home, so I di"d, he scoffs, sitting down next to me. I wondered who he was. His deep voice sounded familiar. It was a calm but deep voice that somehow comforted me.
I take another sip of my drink, looking in the direction of his silhouette.
"So are we going to sit here and play the guessing game of who's who?" I say. The only information I had on this guy is that he was Jackson's friend, and that didn't help because Jackson's friends with everybody.
"Yup, that's how this is going to be," he says, chuckling. God, he reminded me of Smith, but it didn't hurt me to talk to him; it almost…soothed me. I placed my hand on the ground next to his. It's been a long time since I've been this calm. Maybe it was the fact I didn't know who this guy was, but it didn't matter to me. I felt safe, so this is where I'm going to stay.
"So, mister nice guy, what's the color of your eyes?" I said while smiling, looking at the dark wall in front of us, and our hands almost touching.
"Blue, my eyes are blue," he slightly laughed as he got ready to ask me a question.
"What's yours?" he said, looking at me. I couldn't see his eyes, but I knew they were pretty. I could feel his smile. It felt so good to finally feel something other than hurt.
"Brown, my eyes are brown, my hair is too. Brown I mean, it's got some blond streaks because I dyed it," I said while playing with my hair before turning my head to look at him. I smiled and leaned my head against the wall as I looked at him. It didn't matter if we couldn't actually see each other because this hallway was so dark; I think we both felt the same way.
"I'm sure you're pretty," he said, tucking some of my hair behind my ear. I felt my face flush pink as I looked away.
"Hey, I was just complimenting you; don't be embarrassed," he laughs, pulling my chin back to him.
"In fact, I promise you're pretty," he whispers. I didn't know how to react to it. I haven't been this happy in months.
"How do you know?" I giggle as we both lean in inches from each other's faces as there's a knock on the door. That could only be one thing.
"Cops," we say in unison, quickly getting up and running around the corner to the stairs. There was finally light when we went into the closet before we finally looked at each other.
My eyes go wide
"It's you!" I say with a wide eye as he covers my mouth, turning off the light as we hear footsteps. Now that I think about it, I would like to take back my decision to go to this party. My scholarship and everything else could be gone if a cop opens this door, let alone the fact that I'm stuck in here with him.
"This couldn't get any worse, huh?" he whispers in my ear.
"Yup, it couldn't get much worse than being stuck in here with a guy like you." I scowl at him, us both whispering, hoping not to get caught.
"Trust me, I'm just as thrilled," he said, looking away. I wanted to beat him to a pulp, but I knew my size wasn't going to help with that matter. For some reason, I don't hate him as much as I did yesterday. Sitting in that hallway and talking to him made me feel alive again. I haven't felt that way since… since Smith died.