Chapter 3 — Farlund City and a Monster Named Bureaucracy
Farlund City. Capital of the Western Kingdom, said to be full of wonders and advanced technology. But as soon as Sion and his team entered the gates...
"Why does it smell like a rainy village mixed with the stench of corruption?" Sion complained, covering his nose.
Turns out Farlund only looked pretty in the tourism brochures. The reality?
Potholes everywhere, citizens lining up for rice, and a big sign saying:
"SORRY, THE MONSTER WITHIN HASN'T BEEN DEFEATED YET. PLEASE PRAY FOR US."
Sion scratched his head. "Monster within… what's that supposed to mean?"
"It means the monster lives in the town hall," Lyra said flatly.
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Farlund Town Hall: Lair of the Most Complicated Monster
The town hall looked majestic but was guarded by soldiers too busy casting social media magic. And there were long lines of citizens applying for various permits.
"Are we here to complete a mission or sign up for national health insurance?" Durag groaned.
Mimi pointed at the notice board:
ANNOUNCEMENT: TO REPORT A PROBLEM, PLEASE FILL OUT FORM 6969-C AND QUEUE AT THE COUNTER THAT'S ONLY OPEN ON ODD THURSDAYS.
Sion walked straight to the counter.
"We're official adventurers sent by the Guild. Our mission is to eliminate the monster terrorizing this city."
The clerk lazily replied, "Is your task letter stamped by the local village head? Got your vaccination card?"
Sion forced a smile. "We're not applying for a desk job here."
Eventually, after a painfully long wait, they were given some waiting room chairs.
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Meeting the Secretary
After nearly an entire day, they were finally summoned to meet the highest-ranking official: the Secretary of Divine Administration, Lord Vandel. He wore fancy clothes, small spectacles, and had hair so perfectly styled it looked like instant noodles.
"Welcome, adventurers. Our city is in chaos. A mysterious creature lives underground. It appears at night, causes panic among citizens, and even makes vegetable prices soar."
Sion looked puzzled. "A monster that causes inflation? That's… impressive."
Vandel nodded seriously. "This creature disguises itself as an official. It consumes the city's budget and disappears when inspected. We've tried sealing the underground chamber, but it always escapes with the excuse 'on official duty'."
Lyra whispered, "Is this a monster or just… a corrupt bureaucrat?"
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Exploring the Underground Chambers
After much drama (Mimi faked tears and Kuro faked possession), they were finally given access to the underground.
It was dark, damp, and smelled like old paperwork.
Strange writings covered the walls:
"Aid Funds: Still Pending Since Year 1203"
"Financial Report: Copy-Pasted Since 1200 B.C."
Kuro whispered, "This place is creepier than a former official's mansion."
Suddenly, the monster appeared.
A giant creature with five arms, each holding stamps, ink pads, and piles of documents.
"I AM FORMULORD! MASTER OF FORMS AND SIGNATURES!"
Sion stepped forward with a grin. "I've faced worse. This guy's just a living DMV."
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Battle Against Formulord
Formulord attacked with scrolls that bound anyone who hadn't filled out the right fields. Lyra almost got trapped for leaving the "occupation" section blank. Mimi was silenced for not completing her health info.
Durag tried to swing his weapon, but was stopped by a magical rule: "No weapons allowed without written authorization."
Sion laughed out loud.
"You think I'm scared? I'm a citizen of Konoha, bro! I fill out forms daily till it drives me nuts!"
He leapt forward, grabbed a scroll, and ripped it apart.
"WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!?" Formulord screamed.
"I used the ultimate civilian skill: clever excuses, loopholes, and patience beyond reason."
Lyra cast a data-rewriting spell. Mimi sent spam-prayers to the heavens. Kuro and Kura bit all the monster's stamps.
Finally, Formulord collapsed. Out of its body fell fake documents, duplicate data, and a proposal for a trash can that cost as much as a horse.
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Farlund Begins to Heal
The town hall was in chaos after the battle. Systems crashed. But citizens smiled again, because as of that moment, chili prices dropped and permit processes sped up.
Lord Vandel offered his thanks:
"You've saved this city. We'll prepare your reward... as soon as Parliament approves the paperwork."
Sion facepalmed. "Great, another delay."
That night, they received a new letter from the Guild:
Next destination: Eastern Region.
Problem: A Goblin King scamming people with a fake startup. Immediate action required.
Durag groaned. "We haven't even rested."
Lyra turned to Sion. "You in?"
Sion smirked. "If we can beat tie-wearing rats, a goblin selling false promises should be a piece of cake. Probably one of those 'Buy a horse now, get rich in a month' schemes. Freaking MLM goblins."
"But before that, let's collect our social aid funds from the town hall," Sion added.
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