Catherine…
He knew my name.
I knew he had to know my name if I was standing before him, even though I am like a speck of dust before a person like the Kingmaker. But it drove the point home that I was way over my head.
I felt a chill in my heart, and my head went blank for a second.
However, I have never been one to back down from a little taunting. Moreover, he was right. I had said those things. I did say I wanted to know the truth about the convoluted conspiracies of the world, even if it meant I would die.
And as I faced the man I believed was behind it, or at least largely behind, the current state of the world, I could not stop the little gremlins in my head. I wanted to know the truth. I wanted to uncover 'The Great Conspiracy Project' I believed was brewing.
And let's be honest…
The outcome of the story was likely my death.
I might as well learn something before I die.
"Why did you kidnap me? From what I understand, you do not commit crimes or sins personally. Your trick is paying other people to commit sins on your behalf in the name of righteousness," I say, channelling my best female lead in a fantasy novel bravado.
(I mean, the female lead might be annoying, but her unfounded bravery tends to get her out of sticky situations.)
Again, the Kingmaker shows some amusement on his face.
Once again, he reminds me of my father. Even the way he wears his glasses is quite similar. And disconcerting. I can almost understand why he has never been associated with the wickedness of the world despite the role he plays.
"I did not kidnap you. My people saved you. With the way you have been living, it is a miracle you survived the accident. Well, the miracle was a technological one. Someone slowed down your car, preventing it from crashing after you had a minor heart attack," the Kingmaker said.
"You sent someone to watch me?" I was horrified, albeit a little flattered.
Do not judge me. The other stalkers I have had were less than impressive. Still, the thought was horrifying.
I chose to ignore the fact that he claimed I had a minor heart attack. It was not that I did not believe it. It was probably the one thing I believed so far.
"I wanted to know what was driving someone as powerless as yourself to seek the truth. I have to admit that I was disappointed. I thought you wished to save the world. Instead, you were killing yourself to satisfy your curiosity," the Kingmaker said.
The disapproval reminded me of when my father would teach me complex equations when I was very young. He could not understand why I was not grasping higher mathematics (or how I could not do better in Scrabble AGAINST HIM).
"There is beauty in knowledge for the sake of knowledge," I replied with a defiant tilt of my head.
Again, I use the powerless power of the female lead.
The Kingmaker seemed contemplative. "Indeed. Now that you have sought and found the opportunity to satisfy your curiosity, what would you like to know?"
My heart beat a little faster with excitement. I was afraid of asking the wrong question because the whims of the rich and powerful were not within my level of understanding. If I asked the wrong question, I might lose a chance to know the truth.
After a long minute, I decided on my question.
"Why?" I asked.
The Kingmaker frowned as if in confusion, but I knew that it was just a psychological trick. This man, if he was just an ordinary man, would never be confused by my question. He was testing and pushing me.
"Why?" He repeated the question.
"I would like to know why you do it. You have money and power. You own numerous companies and organisations that have incredible financial and political influence. Your networks are rich, and the other powerful people offer you money unprompted."
I felt like I was on a roll, forgetting where I was. I started pacing as I got excited, as I always do when I am speaking of something interesting. When my brain gets moving, my body can hardly stay still.
"You could use this power to do good and positive things. Instead, you choose to target the weak and powerless. You seem to have your heart set on making the world regress to the age of the crusades, where the temple has absolute authority."
I continued, totally on a roll.
"To a person like you, such a world might be great because you will still hold the power. But do you understand what the rest of us go through just to get a little bit of human dignity? People have fought for so long for the little bit of freedom we have, and you are choosing to take it away just because you can."
"You purport to be righteous, and yet you just use people to do evil things in the name of the greater good. I do not know what kind of deity you follow, but no good deity would demand hatred, control, and war."
The Kingmaker leaned back on his almost royal chair as if he was getting more comfortable. It was a relaxed move. However, it made his presence a little stronger. It was like he did not take my words seriously or to heart.
Well, not almost…
He definitely did not take me seriously.
"What is the purpose of religion if not to make the world a better place?" The Kingmaker asked.
He sounded genuine with a hint of cold assurance.
I knew that I was not his opponent, but he was even more cunning than I thought. Because religion has undoubtedly helped a lot of people to leave their wickedness. After all, it was impossible to get a lot of evil people to behave without the threat of hell and the promise of heaven.
To paraphrase a show I hate-love, religion provides a nanny camera, which could be real or just in your imagination. Either way, it makes you behave.
But I could not let it go…
"In theory, religion would make a better place if it did only good. All religious books talk about the beauty of love, community, helping the less fortunate and living in peace. But I have not seen that as long as I have lived," I replied.
"In my opinion, it is possible that there was pure good, prophets and holy teachings. But they have been perverted to ensure that there are people who maintain power while the rest are under control, wallowing in the trenches."
The Kingmaker almost smiled, pushing the glasses with his finger up his nose.