It had been exactly a month since Castiel Winchester had arrived at the Xavier Institute, and things were finally starting to feel... normal.
It was as normal as living in a school full of powerful mutants, telepathic teachers, and secret underground training rooms could be, anyway.
His roommates—Kurt, Bobby, and Piotr—had planned a small outing to celebrate his first month. Kurt was the one who pitched the idea of going to an amusement park just a few towns over. Apparently, Castiel had never been to one before, and when he heard it was "a place of joy and happiness," his eyes lit up with the kind of innocent curiosity that made it impossible to say no.
Colossus even managed to guilt-trip his sister, Illyana Rasputin—aka Magik—into coming along.
"You're coming," he said flatly.
"Why?" Illyana groaned. "So I can babysit angel boy?"
"You need fresh air," he replied. "And if you don't come, I'll tell Logan you've been skipping class again."
She glared. "You're lucky I owe you."
Ms. Grey and Mr. Summers decided to tag along as chaperones, which made it a full-fledged field trip. A small convoy of cars loaded up outside the mansion, and Castiel found himself in the backseat of Piotr's SUV, wedged between Kitty Pryde and Kurt.
Piotr was driving. Kitty was scrolling through music. Kurt kept nervously glancing between Castiel and Illyana, who was glaring out the window, arms crossed, already regretting everything.
"Remind me why I agreed to this?" she muttered.
"Because you love us," Piotr said cheerfully.
When they arrived, Jean Grey used her powers to cast a subtle telepathic illusion over Kurt, disguising demonic features and blue skin to make him look more... human.
Once inside, the group split into smaller pairs.
Jean and Scott went off to the food stands.
Bobby and Kurt ran straight for the water rides.
Kitty grabbed Piotr's hand and dragged him toward the funnel cakes.
Leaving Illyana and Castiel standing in awkward silence near a cotton candy cart.
Castiel looked at her. "Would you... like to go on the rollercoaster with me?"
Illyana sighed. "Fine. Just don't talk too much."
They went on the rollercoaster.
Then another ride. Then another.
And to Illyana's surprise, she actually started to enjoy herself. Castiel wasn't annoying like she expected—he was just... weird. Naïve. Polite to a fault. And occasionally unintentionally funny.
A few hours later, the entire group regrouped at the exit, arms full of prizes, snacks, and way too many photos. Even Illyana had a slight smile on her face.
"I had fun," Castiel said, climbing into the car beside her.
Illyana looked out the window to hide her smirk. "Whatever."
When they returned to the school, everyone slowly dispersed back inside, talking about their favorite rides. Castiel lingered behind with Illyana, unsure of what to do next.
He thought for a moment. Then, inspired by the same forbidden TV he'd watched weeks ago, he remembered the gesture the pizza man had made to the babysitter. A strange but apparently affectionate act.
Castiel, with the worst kind of confidence, reached out and slapped Illyana on the butt.
Illyana froze.
"What," she said, her voice low, "did you just do?"
Castiel blinked. "Was that not... a sign of liking?"
Illyana's eyes flared. Her Soul Sword materialized in her hand in an instant, a massive demonic blade glowing with dark magic.
"Oh no," Castiel muttered, just as the sword came swinging toward his head.
He barely teleported away in time, vanishing from the yard and reappearing in his room with a whoosh of holy light.
Kurt looked up from his comic book. "What happened?"
Castiel stood there, face pale. "I think I made a mistake."
Kurt narrowed his eyes. "What did you do?"
"I... slapped Illyana on the... butt," Castiel admitted.
Kurt's jaw dropped. "Dude. You're dead. Go see the professor. Like, now."
"I agree," Castiel muttered.
Before Illyana could track him down, he teleported again—this time straight to the Headmaster's office.
Charles Xavier was sipping tea at his desk, reading a book on mutant psychology when Castiel appeared out of nowhere, looking like he'd seen a ghost.
"I need help," Castiel blurted.
Charles raised an eyebrow. "Ah. Illyana?"
Before Castiel could respond, Illyana appeared in the room in a swirl of teleportation smoke, sword still glowing, fury in her eyes.
"You little—!"
Charles raised a hand, freezing her in place telepathically. "Let's not kill each other in my office, please."
"he slapped my ass!" she snapped.
"Technically I did," Castiel said, raising a hand. "But I thought it was... affection."
Charles tried not to laugh but failed. "Oh dear."
He turned to Illyana. "Illyana, I know you're angry. Rightfully so. But Castiel was... misguided. Not malicious. He didn't understand."
Illyana looked at Castiel, disgusted. "You seriously didn't know that was sexual?"
"I was misled by a pizza man," Castiel said with perfect sincerity.
Charles smiled gently. "Castiel, perhaps it's time we start some lessons in social behavior. Especially concerning... boundaries."
Castiel nodded solemnly. "Yes, Professor."
"Every day. 7 p.m. My office."
Illyana crossed her arms. "Next time we're in the Danger Room, I'm taking your hands."
Castiel swallowed. "Understood."
She vanished with another bamf.
Charles sighed and looked at Castiel. "Castiel, you've got a lot to learn."
Castiel left the office and returned to his room, only to find Piotr waiting for him with his arms crossed.
"I heard," he said simply.
"I didn't mean to," Castiel said.
"I know," Piotr replied. "But that's my sister. Don't ever do that again."
"I won't."
Piotr nodded. "Good. We're still cool."
Later that night, Castiel lay in bed, staring at the ceiling, cursing one specific man.
"That bloody pizza man," he whispered.
And with that, he turned over and went to sleep, already dreading his first etiquette lesson the next evening.